The Lost Art of Entertaining
Afternoon tea with
Charles The Butler
I was fortunate to meet
Charles MacPherson one afternoon at the famed Butler School in Toronto. Despite
his busy schedule, the jolly, kind-hearted expert on etiquette (fondly
referred by Marilyn Denis as Charles The Butler), took a moment for SukasaStyle.
I thought you’d enjoy reading most of the interview in Charles MacPherson’s own
delightful words.
I think the world is
confused right now. I think the world is trying … etiquette evolves/changes as
society changes. Although there is
always the basis of being gracious and kind and respectful to others no matter
what. Society is trying to figure out the new technologies of the world and how
that fits into our lives.
How does it work with technology?
There’s no excuse to have
technology at the dinner table. Unless you are a surgeon about to be called
into surgery to save someone’s life, there is no reason why anyone can justify
to me why you are so important you need to have your phone at the table. Even
the president of the United States who is the most important man in the world doesn’t
keep his phone on the table. Someone will come get him if there’s a crisis
going on.
Just because you have
your cell phone on, doesn’t mean you have to answer it. There’s nothing wrong
with that.
Charles The Butler loves... |
My nickname came from a TV show, Charles in Charge. I
thought it was a term with affection, with love and with respect
Tell me how you became Charles the Butler?
Marilyn Denis came up
with it. She started calling me Charles the Butler first on her radio show
Who is your role model, and why?
With the fear of
sounding corny, my role model would be The Queen of England. She’s dedicated to
her job, she’s gracious, tireless and always working for her country. It has
nothing to being a monarchist. Whether you agree or disagree with being a
monarch, that’s a separate conversation. But just being able to admire her
devotion and how she works and has given her life to the country, I think is
very admirable.
Was working hard part of upbringing you had?
It’s instilled into you
by your parents/grandparents when you are young. It’s not something you are
born with…it has to be instilled in us.
What's your superpower / spirit animal?
I am very aware of what
I believe is karma. A spirit of doing good for others and doing good for
yourself. I have a connection for belief of karma.
….It’s something I’ve always had.
I went to India 5 years
ago to work at the Taj Hotels, it changed my life. I know people who go to India
and it’s such an altering experience because as my friend mentioned is because
of the vivid colour of the nation. But I was humbled and reborn – being in a
society of people that were so kind and gracious, and that was just the way the
society is. Yes you can find negatives and positives in most societies, but I
just felt so genuinely welcomed and received there that I left a different
person…I think I left a happier person, and more at peace.
For what appears to sometimes visually as a poor nation,
it’s not a poor nation. It’s a rich nation of intelligent people who are
thirsty to learn and who want to give.
It’s not for everybody, you have to be able to deal with the
differences in culture and financial resources and understand how some people
have lots of money and some people don’t have any money, but somehow it all
works.
What’s your favourite holiday spot?
Hard to say my fave spot
because there are so many. But there are places where I am most comfortable. I
find that when I’m in New York and London, England, I feel most at peace. Why,
I do not know. Makes no sense to me. I’ve lived in New York for nine years and
it was the best nine years of my life. And when I’m in London, although I’ve
never lived in London, I always feel happy and lucky in London.
Do you have a fave food style?
My fave food style is
peasant food, because I find peasant food is the most comfortable to eat and
the most flavourful, and the most relaxing. Food that’s too fluffy and over
man-handled and produced, I don’t find it very exciting…I always find that I’m
hungry afterwards and I hate that feeling. So, I like foods to be cleaner to be
simpler, I don’t like a lot of heavy things in them, and I like just to be able
to enjoy whatever it is. So one of my fave authors who does that kind of
cuisine is Donna Hay from Australia. It’s very clean. The other person who I
love is Delia Smith from the U.K.
I love Donna Hay because
she focuses on the 5-6 main ingredients and Delia Smith does the classic
British country cuisine. I love cooking. But I only cook when I’m in the
country.
I’m busy. Which is why
when I go to New York, I can go to my hotel and do nothing. And stay inside my
hotel room, watch television, make a pot of tea with some toast, and just sit
quietly and be happy. I don’t need to be on a tour bus or run around the city,
although my fave movie of all time is If it’s Tuesday it must be Belgium.
If you were stranded on a desert island, what 3 items would you take with you?
1. A bottle of my Hermes cologne.
2. Christofle silverwear - a box, or just a few pieces to eat properly.
3. A good Julia Child cookbook.
Do you do any fictional reading?
No. I love to read biographies, and I’m fascinated by
reading letters. Queen Elizabeth – the Queen Mother – her private letters that
was published recenty.
The Butler School – Was
it always something that you wanted to start up? How did you make the dream a
reality?
There was a need. There was no school in North America. Just foolishly jumped into it.
There was a need. There was no school in North America. Just foolishly jumped into it.
What are the top core principles of entertaining?
Make sure everyone has...
1. A drink in their hand
2. Someone to talk to
As long as they have those two things they are calm and
relaxed – they’re having a good time. Flowers, food and décor are all nice, but
at the end of the day that’s not the focal point. People aren’t coming to your
house to eat, they are coming to socialize.
Do you have any tips for entertaining in a small place?
You have to be more
organized. You don’t have the luxury of space to be able to spread yourself
out. And, you have to be more precise. But it can be done.
What is your fave music
to play in the background while entertaining?
Nothing louder than Jazz
or tap. It should be soft at the best of times.
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Something that you send ahead of time saying “looking forward to a wonderful evening”. And it doesn’t matter whether it’s flowers or wine, or food or champagne….Anything is a great hostess gift when you give it ahead of time. I can’t stand the element of surprise when you’ve got your evening planned and someone walks in with a bunch of flowers.
Charles MacPherson's book The Butler Speaks is a must-have guide to fabulous entertaining. Read a review now.
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Charles MacPherson is the president and founder of Charles MacPherson Associates Inc. and brings over 24 years experience in Household Management as the Major Domo for one of Canada's most prominent families as well as his role as Founder and President of Charles MacPherson Associates since 1996. In 2009 Charles opened North America's only registered school for Butlers & Household Managers in Toronto, Canada.
Charles has consulted with both Residential Clients and Hospitality clients in Canada, the USA, UK, Europe, South Africa and China in the areas of staffing, training, planning and managing and is recognized as a world authority in the Household Management and Butler fields respectively. In the past six months alone, Charles has completed assignments at some of the leading hotel properties in China, India and France. Charles has personally written the department standards and was the lead team trainer for Queen Mary 2 and Fouquette's Barrière Hôtel along with being the lead trainer for the butler department of the Four Seasons Hotel in Shanghai, China. Charles heads the Hospitality Advisory & Consulting practice at CMA.
In addition to his other full time duties at Charles MacPherson Associates Inc., Charles released his first book THE BUTLER SPEAKS published by Random House and is currently on the national best seller list for Non-fiction in Canada.
Charles has consulted with both Residential Clients and Hospitality clients in Canada, the USA, UK, Europe, South Africa and China in the areas of staffing, training, planning and managing and is recognized as a world authority in the Household Management and Butler fields respectively. In the past six months alone, Charles has completed assignments at some of the leading hotel properties in China, India and France. Charles has personally written the department standards and was the lead team trainer for Queen Mary 2 and Fouquette's Barrière Hôtel along with being the lead trainer for the butler department of the Four Seasons Hotel in Shanghai, China. Charles heads the Hospitality Advisory & Consulting practice at CMA.
In addition to his other full time duties at Charles MacPherson Associates Inc., Charles released his first book THE BUTLER SPEAKS published by Random House and is currently on the national best seller list for Non-fiction in Canada.
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